Just want to blog about Erap Jokes..

THE WIFE

Sa isang party. Sabi ng isang Ambassador to Erap,

"I haven't met your wife. Where is she?"

Napadaan si First Lady Loi. Sabi ni Erap, "Oh, my wife just passed away."



ERAP'S WORDS OF WISDOM

If the cat is away, the mouse is alone.

If others can do it, don't help anymore.

Don't talk to strangers if your mouth is full.

Don't count the eggs if it is not yours.



Jinggoy: Dad, c mama hinimatay, unconscious.
Erap: Dali lang yan anak, titigan mo para makonscious.

Erap: “I have brain cancer. Yehey!!!”
Ramos: “That’s delicate, how come you’re still happy?”
Erap: “Now I know I have a brain”


Comelec: Oh, simple math na lang! Ano and “2 + 2″?

Erap: Three!
Comelec: Sorry
Ronnie: Mataas pa diyan!
Erap: (in his highest-pitched voice) Threeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!


Executive Secretary Zamora: Sir, Pwede bang palitan ‘tong laptop ko?

Erap: Bakit?
Zamora: Masyadong Mabigat, eh!

Erap noticed the new jeans FVR is wearing and asks.
Erap: Nice jeans! Ano'ng brand?
FVR: Guess
Erap: Levis?
FVR: No! Guess!
Erap: Armani??
FVR: Guess nga!
Erap: Sirit na nga??


Erap's Vehicle
Erap one day went to a car dealer (Mitsubishi) to buy a car. A salesman approaches.
Erap: "Ah, gusto ko sanang bumili ng 16."
Salesman: "Sir, what 16? Ahh 16 valve car?"
Erap: "No, hindi ko kailangan ng kotse na may 16 bulbs. Ang hinahanap ko ay 'yong sasakyan na 4 times 4."
Salesman: "Ahhh, sir, you mean 4 by 4."
Erap: "Is that what I means? OK, sige yun na!!!"
Salesman: "Sir, I recomment the Pajero Intercooler."
Erap: "!#@$!!@#%, I'm the President of the Philippines, bakit ganyan lang ang ibibigay mo sa akin? Bigyan mo ako ng Pajero INTERCOOLEST!"