The Buzzard:
If you put a buzzard in a pen that is 6 feet by 8 feet and is entirely open at the top, the bird, in spite of its ability to fly, will be an absolute prisoner. The reason is that a buzzard always begins a flight from the ground with a run of 10 to 12 feet. Without space to run, as is its habit, it will not even attempt to fly, but will remain a prisoner for life in a small jail with no top.
The Bat:
The ordinary bat that flies around at night, a remarkable nimble creature in the air, cannot take off from a level place. If it is placed on the floor or flat ground, all it can do is shuffle about helplessly and, no doubt, painfully, until it reaches some slight elevation from which it can throw itself into the air. Then, at once, it takes off like a flash.
The Bumblebee:
A bumblebee, if dropped into an open tumbler, will be there until it dies, unless it is taken out. It never sees the means of escape at the top, but persists in trying to find some way out through the sides near the bottom. It will seek a way where none exists, until it completely destroys itself.
People:
In many ways, we are like the buzzard, the bat, and the bumblebee. We struggle about with all our problems and frustrations, never realizing that all we have to do is look up! That is the answer, the escape route and the solution to any problem! Just look up!
Sorrow looks back, Worry looks around, but faith looks up!
Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, and trust in
our Creator who loves us.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
THE STORM
One day a young lady was driving along with her father.
They came upon a storm, and the young lady asked her father, what should I do?"
He said "keep driving". Cars began to pull over to the side, the storm was getting worse.
"What should I do?" The young lady asked? "Keep driving," her father replied.
On up a few feet, she noticed that eighteen wheelers were also pulling over. She told her dad, "I must pull over, I can barely see ahead. It is terrible, and everyone is pulling over!"
Her father told her, "Do not give up, just keep driving!"
Now the storm was terrible, but she never stopped driving, and soon she could see a little more clearly. After a couple of miles she was again on dry land, and the sun came out.
Her father said, "Now you can pull over and get out."
She said "But why now?"
He said "When you get out, look back at all the people that gave up and are still in the storm, because you never gave up your storm is now over.
This is a testimony for anyone who is going through "hard times".
Just because everyone else, even the strongest, gives up. You do not have to...if you keep going, soon your storm will be over and the sun will shine upon your face again.
They came upon a storm, and the young lady asked her father, what should I do?"
He said "keep driving". Cars began to pull over to the side, the storm was getting worse.
"What should I do?" The young lady asked? "Keep driving," her father replied.
On up a few feet, she noticed that eighteen wheelers were also pulling over. She told her dad, "I must pull over, I can barely see ahead. It is terrible, and everyone is pulling over!"
Her father told her, "Do not give up, just keep driving!"
Now the storm was terrible, but she never stopped driving, and soon she could see a little more clearly. After a couple of miles she was again on dry land, and the sun came out.
Her father said, "Now you can pull over and get out."
She said "But why now?"
He said "When you get out, look back at all the people that gave up and are still in the storm, because you never gave up your storm is now over.
This is a testimony for anyone who is going through "hard times".
Just because everyone else, even the strongest, gives up. You do not have to...if you keep going, soon your storm will be over and the sun will shine upon your face again.
Monday, March 8, 2010
“Siguro nga hanggang dito na lang.
Siguro nga hindi na ko magiging sentro ng atensyon mo.
Ok lang, masaya na akong nasa gilid lang ako ng paningin mo.”
-Muta
**************
“you never even thanked me for making you happy then you throw me away just like that. I hate you for using me, for making my life full of shit.”
-tissue
***************
pila-pila lang. Walang tulakan. Lahat tayo mkakalabas.
–tae
***************
“Alam kong may gusto ka sa akin.
Bakit di mo pa ako seryosohin?
Pero gusto ko malaman mo na hindi ako easy2get.Ngayong sem, gawin mo ang lahat para makuha ako!”
-uno
***************
"hindi ibig sabihing marami ng labi ang dumampi sa akin ay marumi no...
hindi ibig sabihing marami ng laway ang natikman ko ay wala na akong dangal..."
---kutsara
***************
ANAK: tay, may manok sa kusina. Tinutuka ang bigas mo.
TATAY: paalisin mo!
ANAK: oi, alis ka daw! ayaw umalis eh
TATAY: takutin mo!
ANAK: awoooooo manooook!! May mumu diyan!
Siguro nga hindi na ko magiging sentro ng atensyon mo.
Ok lang, masaya na akong nasa gilid lang ako ng paningin mo.”
-Muta
**************
“you never even thanked me for making you happy then you throw me away just like that. I hate you for using me, for making my life full of shit.”
-tissue
***************
pila-pila lang. Walang tulakan. Lahat tayo mkakalabas.
–tae
***************
“Alam kong may gusto ka sa akin.
Bakit di mo pa ako seryosohin?
Pero gusto ko malaman mo na hindi ako easy2get.Ngayong sem, gawin mo ang lahat para makuha ako!”
-uno
***************
"hindi ibig sabihing marami ng labi ang dumampi sa akin ay marumi no...
hindi ibig sabihing marami ng laway ang natikman ko ay wala na akong dangal..."
---kutsara
***************
ANAK: tay, may manok sa kusina. Tinutuka ang bigas mo.
TATAY: paalisin mo!
ANAK: oi, alis ka daw! ayaw umalis eh
TATAY: takutin mo!
ANAK: awoooooo manooook!! May mumu diyan!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Host: So tell us, why did join this contest?
Contestant: Me, join this contest, why did I????? Thank you!
############
Host: What do you want to be after you graduate?
Contestant: I want to be a successful Medicine.
############
Host: Hindi ito boob, hindi ito tube. Pero tinatawag itong boobtube. Ano ito?
Contestant : BRA!
############
Host: What is you favorite motto?
Contestant: If others can't why, why can't I!
############
Host : What would you like to say to foreigners?
Contestant: Please come back.
############
(From gay beauty contest)
Host: What is the one thing that symbolizes happiness for you?
Gay contestant: (Stops, thinks and then smiles.) EGGPLANT PO!
############
Host : What is your typical day?
Contestant : I think Saturday po!
############
(From gay contest)
Host: Ano ang advantage mo sa ibang contestant?
Gay Contestant : I think and believe na bilang isang bading......ano nga
po ulit yung question?
############
Host: Which part of your body is your best asset?
Contestant : (Believe it or not she answered) Si Melanie Marquez po!
############
Host : What is your favorite motto?
Contestant : (After a long pause) I don't have a motto eh. (So the crowd
starts helping her out. The crowd starts saying "Time is gold! Time is
gold!")
Contestant : I have na po. Chinese gold!
############
Host : If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how would you do it?"
Contestant: That's a very good question. Keep it up. (Then the girl turns and walks away.)
############
Host: So, you're vegetarian, what is your favorite vegetable?
Contestant : I like potatoes, tomatoes, beans and what's that na nga?
KALABASH?
############
Host : Who is your favorite fictional character?
Girl : JOSE RIZAL! (Crowd starts laughing.)
Host : Who is your favorite hero then?
Girl: Hulk Hogan.
############
Host : If you were to become a superhero, what would your power be?
Girl Contestant: Uhmm... a bumble bee!
############
Host : What is your edge over the other contestants?
Girl Contestant : My edge.... 23 years old.
############
Host : What, in your opinion, is the ideal age for marriage?
Girl : Between 24 and 25!
############
Host : How do you see yourself 10 years from now?
Girl : I'll be 28 years old.
############
Host : Describe your love one in three words.
Girl : Kahit nga po 1 word, kaya ko.
Host : OK, sige!
Girl : In one word, MY LIFE!
############
Host : If you were given any special power, what would it
be?
Girl : Power of Attorney!
############
Host : So you like reading, who's your favorite author?
Girl : Uhmm, Shakespeare.
Host : What works of Shakespeare?
Girl : Hindi ko po alam eh, depende.....
Host : But he's your favorite.
Girl : Eh kasi patay na sya eh.
############
Host : What is the biggest problem facing the youth today?
Girl : Drugs.
Host : Why?
Girl : Mahal eh!
############
Host : What is the essence of being gay?
Contestant : I'm proud to be gay because what is naked is essential to
the eye!
############
Host : What makes you blush?
Girl : Blush on!
############
Host : What is the essence of a man?
Gay Contestant : Testicles!
############
Host : Hey, I heard you almost didn't make it, how did you get here?
Did you ride or did you walk?
Gay Contestant : Of course, did you ride. What do you think of me, did you walk?
Contestant: Me, join this contest, why did I????? Thank you!
############
Host: What do you want to be after you graduate?
Contestant: I want to be a successful Medicine.
############
Host: Hindi ito boob, hindi ito tube. Pero tinatawag itong boobtube. Ano ito?
Contestant : BRA!
############
Host: What is you favorite motto?
Contestant: If others can't why, why can't I!
############
Host : What would you like to say to foreigners?
Contestant: Please come back.
############
(From gay beauty contest)
Host: What is the one thing that symbolizes happiness for you?
Gay contestant: (Stops, thinks and then smiles.) EGGPLANT PO!
############
Host : What is your typical day?
Contestant : I think Saturday po!
############
(From gay contest)
Host: Ano ang advantage mo sa ibang contestant?
Gay Contestant : I think and believe na bilang isang bading......ano nga
po ulit yung question?
############
Host: Which part of your body is your best asset?
Contestant : (Believe it or not she answered) Si Melanie Marquez po!
############
Host : What is your favorite motto?
Contestant : (After a long pause) I don't have a motto eh. (So the crowd
starts helping her out. The crowd starts saying "Time is gold! Time is
gold!")
Contestant : I have na po. Chinese gold!
############
Host : If you were to describe the color blue to a blind person, how would you do it?"
Contestant: That's a very good question. Keep it up. (Then the girl turns and walks away.)
############
Host: So, you're vegetarian, what is your favorite vegetable?
Contestant : I like potatoes, tomatoes, beans and what's that na nga?
KALABASH?
############
Host : Who is your favorite fictional character?
Girl : JOSE RIZAL! (Crowd starts laughing.)
Host : Who is your favorite hero then?
Girl: Hulk Hogan.
############
Host : If you were to become a superhero, what would your power be?
Girl Contestant: Uhmm... a bumble bee!
############
Host : What is your edge over the other contestants?
Girl Contestant : My edge.... 23 years old.
############
Host : What, in your opinion, is the ideal age for marriage?
Girl : Between 24 and 25!
############
Host : How do you see yourself 10 years from now?
Girl : I'll be 28 years old.
############
Host : Describe your love one in three words.
Girl : Kahit nga po 1 word, kaya ko.
Host : OK, sige!
Girl : In one word, MY LIFE!
############
Host : If you were given any special power, what would it
be?
Girl : Power of Attorney!
############
Host : So you like reading, who's your favorite author?
Girl : Uhmm, Shakespeare.
Host : What works of Shakespeare?
Girl : Hindi ko po alam eh, depende.....
Host : But he's your favorite.
Girl : Eh kasi patay na sya eh.
############
Host : What is the biggest problem facing the youth today?
Girl : Drugs.
Host : Why?
Girl : Mahal eh!
############
Host : What is the essence of being gay?
Contestant : I'm proud to be gay because what is naked is essential to
the eye!
############
Host : What makes you blush?
Girl : Blush on!
############
Host : What is the essence of a man?
Gay Contestant : Testicles!
############
Host : Hey, I heard you almost didn't make it, how did you get here?
Did you ride or did you walk?
Gay Contestant : Of course, did you ride. What do you think of me, did you walk?
Monday, March 1, 2010
A holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said, 'Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'
The Lord led the holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water.
The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful. But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.
The Lord said, 'You have seen Hell.'
They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one.
There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.
The holy man said, 'I don't understand.'
'It is simple,' said the Lord. 'It requires but one skill. You see they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of themselves.'
The Lord led the holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy man's mouth water.
The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful. But because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.
The Lord said, 'You have seen Hell.'
They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one.
There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.
The holy man said, 'I don't understand.'
'It is simple,' said the Lord. 'It requires but one skill. You see they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of themselves.'
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